so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
