Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
