I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Randomize
