I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
