I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Never underestimate the power of titties
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize