come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
