GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
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