A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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