Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
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