Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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