handjob tips. give me some.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
