Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
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