i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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