It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize
