peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
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