Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
