Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
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