he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
