This is the prime rib incident all over again
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
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Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
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Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize