My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Randomize