walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
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