forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
