I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
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you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
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Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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