people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
i just google imaged poop.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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