I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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