i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Randomize
