i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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