I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
found the other keg... it's in the tree
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
We talked him into tasing himself.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
