you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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