I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
