just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize