should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Randomize
