I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I'm too high and old for this...
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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