sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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