Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
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