I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize