I wannas sexs uuuuu
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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