Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache
You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice
Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time?
I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz....
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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