We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Reggie can tackle my bush.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
