Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
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