i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Randomize
