I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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