At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
