Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
