I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Randomize
