Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize