I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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