i just google imaged poop.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize