So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
I look better un-naked...
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Randomize
