I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
