If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
